Rocky Cape Christian Community

Stable, and a Permanent Member of a Christian Community, Form Priceless Friendships in the Process, and Become an Agent of the Holy Spirit in Building the Church of Jesus Christ

1. You become useful to Jesus after you become his disciple—after you know his voice (something that happens over a period of time), his Spirit fills you, and you become his friend by doing his commandments. With Jesus on your side and with his Holy Spirit calling you into the community (koinonia) of the saints, you have a foundation to build on that will weather all storms, all persecution, all tribulation, every attempt of the devil to move you and destroy. 
2. Do not think of joining a Christian community for any other reason than to let go of yourself, let go of all your possessions, all selfish dreams and desires, to give everything you have—body and soul—to Jesus. On doing that you may become a useful, stable, and permanent member of his body. He grafts you into the good olive tree of his living church. You begin to grow. You blossom out and bear fruit. Jesus and all that belong to him take pleasure in you.
3. Before joining a community, find out how it stands with Jesus. Study what it believes. Ask for its statement of faith and spend much time in prayer about it. Visit the community a time or two (for extended periods, if possible) before making plans to move. Do not consider moving into it as long as you remain unconvinced of its sincerity, or find yourself unable to support what it practices and believes.
4. Have no illusions about life in community being pleasant, enjoyable, or a quick solution to all your problems. It only becomes pleasant, its unspeakably great joy becomes yours, only after you get crucified in it—like Jesus. Have you heard of an enjoyable, modern-day-American, “fun” way of getting crucified? It doesn’t exist. Drop the idea that as soon as you are not enjoying yourself, you must be doing something wrong. Jesus did not enjoy the cross. It was not meant to be enjoyed. But far beyond it he saw “the joy set before him” and endured it with no complaints. Do the same and you will overcome all obstacles with him.  
5. Do not join a community to “have a good time.” You will have a terrible time. To join a community is to finish the job of dying to self. How do you prefer to die? Quick and easy, or long, slow, and tortuous? Or do you wish to avoid dying altogether—to stay hanging on the cross, struggling, gasping, letting everyone know how much it hurts? It doesn’t matter what you wish or prefer. The only way to reach the joy set before you is to DIE. Once the need for that becomes clear to you, you begin to see your life in community as the best thing that ever happened to you. You will never leave.
6. Forget Chuck Swindoll, James Dobson, Josh McDowell, Robert Schuller, and Norman Vincent Peale on your way to community. Modern evangelical books, tapes, and mission literature will not get you there. Neither will most modern-day Anabaptist (Mennonite, Charity, or Beachy Amish) teaching. If you must read anything beside the Bible, try Gerard Groote (The Brethren of the Common Life), John of the Cross, or Jean Vanier. Even though communities that follow Jesus will not follow these men in all areas, there is a connection. All working communities (working Hutterite communities included) have more in common with the orders of the Middle Ages than they do with the modern Western “church.” They function along the same line of self-denial versus the fulfilment and glorification of self. Discover the painful difference. Discover the joy!
7. Do not let your disappointment, your disillusion, your absolute shock with communal living stop you. Life in community must bring out the very worst in you before it can bring out the best. Little by little, like thistles coming out of angry sores, your “foreign matter” must get removed. Horrible, but what a relief in the end!
8. So your friends call the community you joined a cult? Rejoice! Right from the start Jesus and his followers faced that accusation. As long as the world, and the worldly religious, see the followers of Jesus as dangerous and attack them—as long as the world calls their teaching “cultish” and a trap—they do not have much to worry about. But once the world stops doing that and begins to love them, once the world accepts a community and conventional “churches” begin to work with it in a brotherly way, watch out! There is no “middle road” to heaven.
9. Do false communitarians (those just living in community for economic or family reasons, or because they were born there) and ungodly, un-Christ-like communal groups scare you? Let God take care of them. Keep your eyes on Jesus. Keep marching steadfastly, with those that love him, toward the goal!
10. Do you have rebellious, unruly, or poorly trained children? Work with your community to correct the problem. Do not lose hope! Competent brothers and sisters will surround you and help you do what is possible (older “spoiled” children often being beyond help’s reach). The more humbly and graciously you accept advice on how to do your job, the quicker you may see results. 
11. Do not expect your new life in community to transform your marriage—if it is less than the best. Present your troubles openly to Jesus, to one another, and to the church if necessary, until you overcome them. Only with peace and order in the home (even in homes where one partner or the other has left) will you become useful and stable in the church. Only then can you pray. 
12. Do not quickly make your vows to Jesus and his community of followers. Solomon said it is better not to vow than to make a vow and break it. But when the time comes, do not fear. Jesus himself will help you make and keep them.
13. On coming into the community observe for a long time what makes it work, how it functions, and what it takes to keep it going. What doesn’t make sense right away may become clear to you after a couple of years.
14. Draw no quick conclusions about how people receive you in the community. Some brothers and sisters are more bashful than others. But after a while you may discover them spiritual gems. They may become your best and most faithful friends.
15. Set your focus, not on the followers of Jesus, but on Jesus himself. The closer you draw to him, and the tighter you stick with him during the day, the easier your time of adjustment will be. Jesus knows all about it. He will lead you right. Trust him!
16. Watch out your newfound activities in community do not detract you from reading the Bible, from spending much time in meditation and prayer. Only the calm and inner peace of communion with Jesus enables you to meet and mingle with your new family day in and day out, day after day.
17. Joining community is an adoption procedure. The closer you draw to the parent that adopted you (God) the sooner you bond with his children around you.
18. Avoid staying in your apartment, reading books, speaking on the phone, or sitting at a computer while the rest are out working. Join in! Even though you may not know how to do much, the brothers and sisters will love your willing spirit and respond positively to it. Whatever you don’t know you can learn.
19. Enjoy your new friends’ sense of humour (even though you may not always understand it). Taking others, and yourself, too seriously can be a serious mistake and hindrance. But do what you can to keep the atmosphere around you godly, loving, and scented with the sweet awareness of Jesus all the time. Better not tell what is “funny” or unnecessary, than say it and wish you hadn’t. 
20. Learn what you can about your community’s past and what it has historically believed. Respect your brothers and sisters for it, but do not judge them on the basis of their past. Accept them for who they are and to what they have come, just like you want them to accept you. We are all human, and all more alike than different.
21. Never think your brothers and sisters have it easier for being “born into community.” They have a whole set of temptations (wondering what life “outside” might be like) that you don’t. Leave it in the hands of God. He makes sure no one gets tempted more than he is able to bear. He purges every believer as gold in the fire. He is just, not willing that anyone should perish and and makes it equally possible for all to be saved.
22. Enjoy the “special times” in community—evenings around the campfire, everyone gathering melons or husking corn, great singing and visitors from afar—just like you always imagined it would be. But do not build your life around these events. Remember that much of life has to do with working to eat, sleep, and get ready for winter. Do your smallest most humble work (washing clothes, caring for the animals, fixing or cleaning things) as unto the Lord, and you will love it. If necessary read Brother Laurence!
23. Let your guiding motif be how best to serve your brothers and sisters. Ask for no more than absolutely necessary. Expect no favours. Spend no time thinking how people treat you. Forget yourself, notice others and their needs, do what Jesus did and you will find yourself supremely happy before you know it.
24. Be thankful in every situation. No truly thankful person has ever been discouraged.
25. Communal living allows for not a minute of boredom. With so many people and so many needs around you, you can spend all your spare time (and all the rest of your time) serving and praying. Let Jesus open your eyes and you will discover numberless things to do, right in front of you.
26. When you join community, forget about travelling, taking “time off,” and the senseless shopping urge of the Western world. Learn how to shrink your needs and expand your generosity. Before asking for privileges, offer to take another’s place in the work force, look for little jobs no one is getting done, think of ways to give time, help, and encouragement to those that need it. Life in community offers a new dimension in giving—not just giving a measly tenth of your money, but giving it all, yourself included.
27. When others want to help you (materially or spiritually, accept it with grace. Learn how to receive as well as to give. That is part of the foundation of communal equality.
28. Even though your community operates on the basis of equality, pay no attention to what others get or what they already have. If you get anything less, or of poorer quality, rejoice! Just be glad it is you picking up the slack and not someone else. Never read discrimination or selfishness into the motives of others in the community. Whatever they don’t get done right is more than likely just an oversight.
29. If you are a single person, be friendly but careful in your relationships with those of the opposite sex. Adjusting to life in community tends to be a difficult time. Not everyone pulls through successfully. Before getting involved in an emotional relationship that may lead to marriage, the brothers and sisters will expect you to work on other things. Once you have come to know the community well, and everyone knows and feels comfortable with you, proceed in the Spirit of Jesus. Marriage in community is indeed a blessed experience.
30. Even though you may relate easier to some than to others, try to make friends with everyone in the community. Avoid “zeroing in” on one person, giving him or her too much of a load to carry, or pursuing a relationship until it becomes awkward and cumbersome. Depend on no man but on Jesus, and you will never be “let down.”
31. Be open and honest with yourself, telling others what they need to know about you. But tell nothing just to make others say things about themselves. Much about your past life in the world may best be left untouched. Paul “considered it dung” to win Christ.
32. If you have children, allow them to find their place in the social structure of the community. Even though communities consist of godly homes, remember that the modern “nuclear family” does not have a place within it. The whole community, in a sense, is one large family. Everyone belongs one to another, like the members of a body. To incorporate new members (implants) is a big event. To lose a member is an amputation. This is how Jesus meant his church to be.
33. If you have questions about the community, or feel frustrated by how things are going, speak to brothers or sisters in a position to help you. Do not vent your frustration on your marriage partner or your children. What happens is not their fault and they cannot fix it. They need nothing but your faithful love. 
34. Try, in as much as you can, to “fit in.” Unless you have a good reason not to change, try doing things in every way like the rest of the brothers and sisters in your community (eating and sleeping habits, dress styles, preferences in music, recreation, travel, etc.). A common identity strengthens community and enhances its spiritual life. Do not worry about “losing your face in the crowd” or becoming “nothing but an invisible member of a greater whole.” You see no grapes in a bottle of wine, or whole kernels of wheat in a loaf of bread.
35. If you have deeper convictions than your community in any area, determine whether it is something you would die for. If you are not ready to burn at the stake for what you feel, it is not a conviction but a preference. In most cases you should adjust your preferences to those of your brothers and sisters around you. In some insignificant areas, it may not even be necessary—if you handle them with grace.
36. Take your place as parents in the home. Assume full responsibility for your children, bringing them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. But do not think you are the only ones able to teach them. Give your children the opportunity to learn from your brothers and sisters in Christ as. Do not be selfish with them. Your children will learn quickly how to relate to primary, secondary, and tertiary authority. (Primary being that of Jesus and his church, secondary that of their parents, and tertiary that of their group leaders and teachers.)
37. Never think of yourself as more educated or more capable in any way than your brothers and sisters in community. Obviously they were getting along fine (perhaps for centuries) before you came. Respect them and you will learn much from them. You will also come to love them.
38. Say nothing about what you have “given up” to join community. It is not important. Everyone, whether born into the community or from elsewhere, has exactly the same amount to give up—that is, themselves. It cannot be proven that it is any easier for one person than for another.
39. If you see anything happening in the community that seems dangerous or wrong, pray about it first—perhaps for a year, or longer. Or, if it appears to be an immediate danger, present your concerns in a humble, respectful way (not depending only on your own judgement) to a person that may be able to fix it. Your concerns, if presented well, will cause no alarm or disruption. In a good community they will be appreciated.
40. Do not waste your time thinking of what might happen to you and your children in the future. No one but God knows the future. Serve him faithfully today and trust what comes into his hands.
41. Never threaten the community with leaving unless they do as you say. Rather, help the community find creative ways to solve its problems, be patient while it happens, and work with your brothers and sisters, never against them. Then, with Jesus’ presence among you, it may all work out.
42. Even though you voice a concern and nothing happens, do not give up. If the concern stays with you, pray more. Give gentle admonition as needed. But never run ahead of the community, or balk if things do not go your way. Keep working faithfully, cheerfully, with Jesus and your brothers and sisters. Your labour will not be in vain.
43. Be careful about the information you receive. If members (possibly unsatisfied or weaker members) come to you with complaints about the community, you do best not to get involved. Or, if it is something you need to know about, ask a reliable mature person. Keep your eyes on Jesus. Avoid gossip and getting involved in petty disagreements.
44. Be very careful how you relate to the children, young people, and newer members of the community. If you have questions or concerns about the community as a whole, do not confront them. Do not let anything you say or do influence them to disobey their parents or lose respect for the community’s leadership. It would be better to have a millstone hanged about your neck and drown, than to influence any of these precious souls the wrong way.
45. Once you have moved into a community, and the process of “growing into the body” has begun, you have a moral obligation to stay. One does not implant organs only to jerk them back out if adjustment gets difficult. One works with the situation as long as possible. Likes or dislikes have nothing to do with it (crucified people don’t have many). The only legitimate reason to move out of a community is to escape actual wickedness—to avoid taking part in a community’s rebellion against the teaching and example of Jesus, or to flee from the influence of unrepented, un-dealt-with, sin. Anything short of that is not reason enough to leave.

No tower, left half-finished, gives pleasure to the one that builds it, or to those passing by. No battle, given up when half-ways through, accomplishes a good purpose. Only the one that “gives up everything he has” and goes the whole way with Jesus—come what may—receives the crown (Luke 14:25-33, James 1:12). 

Nothing will bring you greater joy in life than to have given yourself to Jesus, without reservation, and to all that belong to him.

Peter Hoover

12 October 2003